How can you get rid of problems and stress

Pacient psihiatru ne la:. ". Doctore, am o Problema version fiecare noapte cand MĂ culc, ma simt cca se ascunde echipei cineva sub pat Apoi te ridici a scris un viziona Si, desigur, Nu EXISTA O sa ma întorc la somn, Dar dupa o. În timp ce MĂ Nu oală GANDI m-am uitat combină. mi vin în Jos Si căutați sub pat SI FARA NICI ONU rezultat, desigur. pe afluență, Desi eu filate CA e de rahat, ma simt mereu nevoia de a Va asigura CA Nu faci o sub pat. doctor, Interkultureller Austausch www.grenzenlos.or.at Lucru distruge Viața mea, față Poti CEVA? "
Psihiatru: "Uh, da, da ... obsesiv-compulsive ... Luați version considerare Patru ani de sesiuni de psihoterapie, Trei pe Săptămâna, SI VA vindeca de această obsesie."
Pacient: "? Decizia, CAT DE Mult MA VA Costa, Doctore"
Psihiatru: "100 dolari pe sesiune"
Pacient: "Ei Bine, CRED CA am sa ma gandesc la Asta ..."
Sase Târziu Luni mai, psihiatrul pacient se întâlnește întâmplător pe strada "Domnule, de ce Nu te-ai intors la Biroul meu?"
Pacient: "? 100 Dolari sesiune baiat pizza îngrijire-mi aduce Rezolvat Problema mea cu NUMAI 5 Dolari."
Psihiatru: "!???? Baiat pizza cu Adevarat si cum se face"
Pacient: "Am Fost sfătuit SA Taie picioarele DIN pat!"







PLAY AND WIN MONEY

Why the big cock husband

Mom, dad and 10 year old boy eating pasta dinner. The boy was picky and would not eat. At one point, the father approaches the boy, he whispered something in her ear and proceeds to eat it all immediately and zbugheste in his room.
Mother, delighted father asks:
- You're amazing, what did you say? How'd you do it?
Father proud, replies:
- I said that if you do not eat everything, it will be small when he grows up.
5 minutes pass and pow! receives a spoon headed the wife.
- What happened?
wife:
- YOU WHEN YOU WERE SMALL, why do not you eat everything on your plate?

What could explain the husband when his wife caught with lover

Husband returns from work and finds his wife in bed with a young man . Angry husband starts yelling , throwing things and wants to seize the unfaithful wife . It however says :
- Before making crazy please listen to how could this happen :
As I was driving home I saw this young man bitter and starving. I brought him home and gave him food that your training and you have not eaten it because you went to dinner with friends.
I saw that he was barefoot and I gave your shoes new that you have not worn because they were a gift from my mother. I saw that she was cold and I gave him the sweater you had done your birthday and you do not wear it because it does not fit with your lifestyle . His trousers were torn so I gave your good jeans do not wear them because you do not fit .
Changed when I said he could take a bath and I gave you frother that I brought from Paris and do not use it because it causes your allergy.
And when the young man came out of the bathroom she asked me if I have something you do not use ...

Driving nervous driver

A man driving a car. Night, he very tired after several hours of driving. At one point, pull over for much needed nap. Never doze grabs it, that it awakens one:
- Excuse me, you have a watch? Angry man responds:
- It's 4:30! It sticks and sleep.
After some time, another his rapping window:
- Excuse me, you have a watch? This and more nervous:
- E 5 not 10! Then write on a large piece "I know what time" and stick to the car.
A third stops and beat them in the window.
- What do you want me? asks the driver pissed.
- It's 5:10!

How can you get rid of the house unseen lover

While Maria sex with her ​​lover, John enters the house. In great haste, the woman tells her lover:
- Hide behind the TV!
John starts his TV and drinking beer while his wife does not know how to make him leave the room. Finally, she called out from the kitchen:
- John, come fast to see what miracle happened to me! I dropped a porcelain plate on the floor and I jumped back in the mine, intact!
- That's nothing! Ion cry room. Just now a player was penalized with a red card and sent off. When he came out, passed by me!

Rescue parachute

Pope, Berlusconi and Bush flew.
The plane has a serious defect and the pilot announces how things but the worst part is that there are only three parachutes.
Bush:
  - I am the strongest man in the world so it makes sense to save myself! Wrest a parachute and jumps. Berlusconi:
  - I am the smartest man on the planet! It's all right to live. Rip and he a parachute and jumps. Pope to pilot:
  - Son, I got my best with the Almighty and can do a miracle for me, and if he does not end up in heaven anyway. So you take the parachute left!
  - No need for that Your Holiness, we still have two parachutes because the smartest man in the world jumped with my backpack!

Some programs in hell to be respected Device

They say one dies and goes to hell.
Seeing it there, it bufneşte while weeping and sobbing so, comes to him a devil :
- What are you doing lad, why are you crying so ?
- Well we arrived in Hell , look and map , " You are here " . I'll burn and tormented me .
- Nonsense , who has you put crap in your head? That's propaganda on Earth and in Heaven .
- But ... I'm not going to bother?
- Run lad of here , as you struggle ! This practice sins on Earth . Look , I'll give an example: you like to drink ?
- I drink , but in moderation.
- When you see what cool is Monday ! Monday drink what we want , wine, beer , liquors , whiskey, vodka , brandy , brandy , anything.
- But , well then it's not so bad .
- But wait till you see smoke? - I smoke , but moderate.
 - Well then see Tuesday , nenică Tuesday Turks smoke - smoke cigarettes, hookahs , cigars , pipes , butts , anything.
- Ah , well then it's not so bad .
- But let me see - I like to drink coffee ? - I drink , but only a few per day.
- Well let's see then on Wednesday ! Wednesday drink Turkish coffee , coffee , espresso, latte, cafe - frappe , what we want.
- Job ! I've been quiet .
- Say, say little devil , are you gay?
- No, no way , No way .
- When might you not really like Thursdays ...

How to save the economy?

Suppose that ... government grants to each of us about £ 100,000.
If you spend money in hypermarkets, they will go to China.
If you buy gasoline will reach Arabs.
If buy computers, will arrive in India and Hong Kong.
If you buy fruit and vegetables, will arrive in Turkey, Spain, Italy, Egypt.
If you buy small cars and economic, will arrive in Japan or Germany.
If you buy one of the many electronic gadgets will get in Taiwan.
And nothing will help Romanian economy.
The only way to keep the money at home, in Romania, is to spend it on hookers, the Romanian wine or brandy tasty as they are guaranteed local products!
I just try to do!
But it's hard to convince my wife that I do these things only from patriotism